The Best Sex Positions - and The Top Mistakes Men Make During Sex
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by Rod Phillips

We all want to make sex as good as it can be for our partners.
But there's more to good sex than choosing the best sex
position - you have to know which sex positions and techniques
to avoid! So here is a list of things for men to avoid during sex,
along with some advice about the best sex positions - the ones
that will make sex great for both of you!

First Sex Position Mistake: Pushing your partner to do anything
she isn't comfortable with. So, if you've been thinking of trying
the outrageous sex positions adopted by some porn stars,
forget it! Start from a more realistic place. Being comfortable
for a woman involves two things: first of all, she has to be
physically comfortable. That might mean she isn't going to feel
too happy if you ask her to put her ankles behind her ears
while you have sex. It might also mean that you have to avoid
any position that gives you the deepest penetration, since your
penis might bang her cervix and give her some serious
discomfort. Second, she has to emotionally comfortable.So if
you treat her like one of those porn stars, she isn't going to be
too happy either, and you're not likely to be invited back to
bed. This includes: wanting to ejaculate over her without her
whole-hearted agreement, using dirty talk that is disrespectful
to her, wanting to slap her butt if she isn't into it, and generally
treating her like a sex toy.

Object rather than a person. Second Sex Position Mistake:
Being too much of a gentleman. There's an old saying: "A
gentleman takes his weight on his arms." If you think this is the
best way to behave during sex in the man on top position, did
you ever try asking your partner what she wants? A lot of
women like to feel the weight of their man on top of them
during sex - they say things like: it makes them feel safe,
secure, loved, or that they just like to feel the energy and
power of their man in this position. Sure, if you're a lot heavier
than she is, you might squash her, so exercise some
judgement, but generally, in the man on top position, let her
feel your weight!

Third Sex Position Mistake: Don't just lie there all the time when
she's having fun. If she's on top, riding you, remember that you
can still move during sex in this position, even if it's only a little
bit. You can thrust your hips to match her movements, raise
your knees to alter the angle at which your penis enters her
vagina, and caress her breasts and clitoris if she's facing you
while you have sex. Remember - you don't like it if she lies
motionless during man on top sex, so in this position, return
the favour and move about yourself!

Fourth Sex Position Mistake: Being too aggressive during sex.
Sure, some women like rough sex, either all the time or once in
a while, but for a woman, sex tends to be something special
and she'd like you to treat it that way too! That means not
pumping away aggressively without her encouragement, not
being selfish (i.e. having an orgasm yourself but not bothering
to make sure she has one too), and not moving her around
roughly during sex. If you want to show how much of a man you
are by being a bit dominant, do it with firmness and kindness,
rather than flinging her around the bed like a rag doll.
Needless to say, this advice applies whatever sex position you
are using!

Fifth Sex Position Mistake: Sticking to the same old sex
positions every time you make love. Sure, you don't have to try
all the adventurous and challenging positions you can find on
the internet, but a bit of variation really adds spice to your sex
life. Even if you're extremely fond of the man on top position,
for example, sex in the rear entry or side by side positions will
let you see things very differently, may well get you much more
aroused, and will certainly give you both some different

Rod Phillips is an
online counselor and
sexual therapist at  
Sex and Relationships.